The Mourning After
by clueless788
Summary: A short snippet of the morning after Mitsuba's death. One-shot.


The sun was just beginning to rise to start the day, but the sky was still shrouded in the darkness of the night. The three men returning to the Shinsengumi headquarters were silent. No one uttered a word as they trudged into the building they called home. Kondou's arm was slung protectively around Sougo's shoulders as silent tears fell from the older man's eyes. He had never been able to keep his emotions in check. The black haired man, still clutching an empty packet of spicy crackers, followed the pair a few paces behind, unable to withstand the company of either.

Inside the headquarters an eerie silence had settled throughout the building; usually at this time the hustle and bustle of all the officers would be heard as they rose and got ready for the day. Today however, not a soul could be seen in the big hall. Everyone seemed to be tucked quietly away in their respective rooms.

"Looks like the other guys got back already." Kondou said gruffly. He had been trying to keep up a brave front, as long as he was still with Sougo. However his teary face and the quiet sniffles that could be heard every so often showed he was failing miserably. Sougo's head remained down, as he stared intently at the floor.

At this point, Hijikata followed into the room. "Ah Toushi, why don't you and…" Kondou's words faltered as the chain smoker simply strode past the captain down into the corridor which led to his small room.

As he heard the slamming shut of a sliding door, Kondou removed his arm from Sougo, who was now staring down the corridor Hijikata had disappeared into.

"Why don't you go wash up and get some rest, Sougo? If you want me I'll be sticking around the headquarters today." Kondou patted the teen reassuringly on the back and watched as the boy sauntered away to his room.

* * *

Hijikata slid his door shut with perhaps more force than necessary. He ripped his jacket off his shoulders and slung it into the corner of the room, already starting on undoing the scarf tied around his neck. He lowered himself onto the floor, not caring he was still dressed in most of his blood stained uniform, and rest his back to the wall.

Finally alone. He had known that permed bastard was on the roof with him, typical really. His legs pulled up towards his chest, Hijikata's forehead rested on his knees. He inhaled a slow breath, the thoughts and emotions of the last few days brimming in his head.

_She's gone. _

The thought echoed in his mind as a slow tear rolled down his face. All the regrets and 'what-ifs' he'd been harvesting over the years came flooding to him and, as if a barrier had been broken, more tears quickly followed and soon he was watching as they fell to the ground. A choked, silent sob left his mouth as the reality of his loss sunk in.

A knock on the door caused Hijikata's head to quickly swivel up in its direction. "I'm getting changed!" He called, keeping his voice to as normal a tone as possible while he furiously wiped at his face and attempted to dry his eyes.

"Toushi," Kondou's voice was softer than usual, nothing to do with the thin barrier between them. "We're the closest thing Sougo has to a family right now, we have to be there for him." The captain's head rested on the door as he spoke, "Especially you, he looks up to you. You can't shut yourself out like this." Kondou jolted forward as the door slid open.

Hijikata cleared his throat before daring to speak, "I'm fine, Kondou." His eyes didn't meet his old friend's as he spoke.

"Toush-." Kondou looked up, eyes widening slightly as he took in Hijikata's appearance; his bloodshot, downcast eyes, the crumpled packet still clenched in his left hand and the fact that Hijikata was still decked out in uniform. Kondou fell silent.

Yes, he had known how Hijikata had felt. But he hadn't expected this. Not from the stoic man who had mastered the art of pushing emotions out of the way long ago. Before Hijikata had a chance to protest, Kondou's arms encircled the younger man, forcing Hijikata's chin to rest on the taller samurai's shoulder. He didn't care that Hijikata's arms remained firmly down, or that he was breeching the man's closely guarded privacy, or even that he may be pushed away any second. They both needed some outlet of emotion and God damn it he would give it if he could.

A few moments passed, their calm breathing and the twittering of birds the only thing to be heard. There was a soft sound of something falling to the ground, before Hijikata's arms slowly raised to awkwardly encircle his oldest friend. He didn't care about his reputation as demon vice-commander at that moment. All he could focus on was the slight weight off of his chest he could feel as he stood with Kondou.

A small creak of floorboards caused Hijikata's eyes to fly upwards to meet the impassive eyes of Sougo watching them. On any normal day Hijikata could expect to find a camera in Sougo's hands, or a sadistic grin which promised imminent blackmail. However today was no normal day by any means, and Sougo's face remained unreadable as he looked away from the pair and continued on his original path.

Hijikata sighed. One day. It would just take one day, and then he'd be back to being the demonic vice-commander, barking orders at useless subordinates, beating Yamazaki to death with one of his many badminton rackets and inhaling mayonnaise as if it was his last meal. But for today, he'd stick with crackers. Spicy crackers.

* * *

A/N:

This sounded way less cheesy with sad Gintama OSTs playing in the background _


End file.
